I thought I was just in a really good mood this morning. Everything seemed to be going great. Then my wife asked if I was going to have to take one of my spot treatment pills for PTSD. I told her no, I don’t think so. I feel fine.
Then I noticed that I had repeated a status at least twice on Facebook. Occasionally, this is one of the first signs that somethings coming in regards to my brain. I start repeating things and don’t know that I’m doing it most of the time. In fact, when I started writing this post, I had to go back a couple of times because I had typed the same sentence twice.
For reasons I still don’t understand, my brain sometimes gets stuck in a loop. Think of it like a spam website that you go to. You go to it once and then each time you open the browser, you get stuck on the same page over and over again. The only way to get out of the loop is to shut it down and start over. My brain with PTSD seems to function in the same way sometimes. I have to take medication to reboot it. Otherwise, I stay in an endless loop until I finally crash.
It sucks, but it is what it is. I have prayed for God to take this away, but as of now He has not. I can only assume and trust that He has other plans for me.